Reply to What would you do if your DH or DW gained over 100 lbs during your marriage?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Mine gained 10-15 lbs  a year. I did everything I could to be supportive from adopting the same diet to going to aerobics if she asked. It only made her feel worse because I'd lose weight and she'd keep gaining. She'd binge eat at work. I tried to pretend it didn't bother me once I realized how bad she felt about herself. I told her she was beautiful, surprised her with gifts, and tried to make her feel desired, but it got to a point where I couldn't get aroused by her. In fact, her getting undressed would have the opposite effect. I always tried to put it on me and make up an excuse. I told her I thought I had ED, but she never bought it. We stopped having sex regularly around the fifth or sixth year. By then, she'd gained well over 100 pounds. I never stopped loving her. I just wasn't physically attracted to her. We divorced about five years later.  We're still close.[/quote]

The hit to the sex life is not acknowledged often enough. There's a lot you can't do with someone who has gained 100 pounds. Entire positions become impossible and many positions cause the obese person's belly to slap you repeatedly during sex, which is really a turn off.  As men gain weight, penis size decreases noticeably because of blood flow issues. They also cannot get as hard or last very long at all.  So this attraction stuff, it's not all mental. It's physiological. [/quote]

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