Reply to What makes a guy a loser?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "What makes a guy a loser? "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Loser flags for me 
1. Doesn’t have a job, can’t keep a job, doesn’t have a vision of what they want to do with their career. Salary doesn’t matter to me, it’s about purpose, passion, and work ethic. 
2. Doesn’t know how to “adult” once they have been out of college 2-3 years. An adult goes to the dentist twice a year, keeps their car maintained and registered, gets haircuts regularly, buys their own clothes, can buy groceries and cook some basic meals, can manage a budget, etc.

I don’t think being close to your family of origin makes you a loser. If that is important to him and you don’t see yourself fitting into that dynamic, then you are not a good fit. I’m not close like that to my family, but I wouldn’t think of less of people that are close knit with their family. [/quote]

I would be curious to tease #1 out, especially the part of having a vision of where they want to go in life.  I am a guy, make good money but have no aspirations to being in the rat race and elevating to executive level.  I am happy to have a flexible job that provides me ample PTO during the year and gives me the flexibility to leave early to pick kids up, go to dr appts, etc.  I work hard at work and have reached a good level at a company.  Basically, my life outside of work defines me - not work.[/quote]

As someone married to a largely-absent workaholic, this would be fine with me.[/quote]

There really is a balance. My DH, now retired, was very ambitious but he was great at focusing and keeping things simple at work. This was great for his career because he accomplished a lot. But it was also great for us because he was always home by 7 or 7:30 and did not work at home in the evenings or on weekends. Many people are workaholics because they are trying to do everything without focusing on the right things. I think it also helped that he knew how much we all loved him and wanted him around. [/quote]

That's great.  I'm PP who raised the question - I'm generally at work by 8:30 and leaving by 5:30.  In between picking kids up, cooking, etc., this works for me and my household and have no interest in working beyond this due to the upheaval it would cost my personal life.  Some people can manage it fine.  If need be, I'll work in the evenings - no issues - but the reality is that I rarely do.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics