Reply to Are most adoptees unhappy?

Forum Index » Parenting -- Special Concerns

Reply to "Are most adoptees unhappy?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][b]   [b] I’d say putting them in counselling / therapy from day one (even if it’s play therapy).

Every single one of the adopted people I know has attachment, mood, or substance abuse problems. That includes within my own extended family. Now, I’m not saying that attachment and substance abuse issues don’t occur with “everyone else”, but I find it interesting that every adoptee I know has an issue. And that’s including those, who by all accounts (including their own) have had a happy life with their adoptive family.

I’ll be honest.. so many thread on THIS board have convinced me that I would never adopt, nor adopt a child I had and couldn’t keep, for whatever reason.
[/b]

Everyone you know, huh? All [b]three[/b][u] of your adopted friends?  What a completely erroneous thing to say. I am in my 60s. I am adopted, and I know many, many adopted children- my parents had many friends who also adopted (or that is why they were friends..) I am also a teacher...I am aware of many adoptive families- local adoptions, closed adoptions, interracial adoptions, overseas adoptions, adoptions of babies, adoptions of older kids, you name it.

[u]No, you are dead wrong. [/u] The children who ended up having issues might have been isolated without proper contact as a baby before adoption in an orphanage or foster care (think about the orphanages in Eastern Europe in the 80s after the collapse of the USSR, or  born to known addicted mothers (and that isn't even always an outcome), and any other issues would appear to be attributed to what occurs in [b]all [/b]families: trauma within the family- yes, the adopted family, not the bio family, trauma to the child of any kind, or kid who experimented as a teenager in substances- no different than kids who do that in biological families. There is no more incidence of issues- addiction, depression, acting out, whatever than any other kid, barring definable and overt etiology, which, BTW, biological kids all have as well. Some of you biological parents suffer with alcoholism, substance abuse, mental illness, genetic issues, too- just because you had your children biologically doesn't render your own sperm and eggs, or parenting style issue- free. You may also be a crappy parent as a biological parent and as an adoptive parent. No one has a handle on raising a perfect kid. Sorry. The many adopted people I know are happy, well-adjusted people. I also do not have depression, have ever been involved with drugs, have enjoyed a successful career, am happily married, and my own kids are well adjusted. Sorry to disappoint, PP. If you knew me, you wouldn't be able to write that all the adopted  people you know have issues, correct?

CRITICAL THINKING, people. We just cannot generalize an idea based upon a limited context. 
[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics