Reply to I feel like I am going to explode but I can't say anything

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Thanks for your reply OP. Then I go back to my original suggestion of evaluating the quantitative value of each choice in a spreadsheet of COA 1 Move vs COA 2 Stay. $55K plus $95K in an area where he has a 3 year contract fresh out of school with limited prior experience meets the financial need right now. This sounds like it’s about his ego and disappointment in a raise. Hopefully if he truly considers an opportunity out of state, the numbers make the argument and you will be in agreement with any transition worthy of consideration at that time.

You are both providing $150k combined HHI in a low COL area on a 3-ye contract with a good company to have tenure with. You have childcare stability for your 2yo, can afford rent and hopefully are tackling student loan/savings/financial goals. You hold a 1mo new WFH position for you (which isn’t guaranteed to exist out of state today, but could be if you price your value to the company for another 1-2yrs and build trust remotely).

He needs a real offer, for a permanent opportunity with measurable benefits that you can quantify before you worry about moving.

until then, unless there is some other issue we are missing here, I don’t see why you can’t share your concerns with him around your point of view in the matter.

It is tough with a 2 year old. I moved twice with one.[/quote]

Op here. I guess I don't understand why he can't find a permanent position. He says it's very common in his field to start as a contractor
 I don't know how accurate that is. I don't know anything about data science/ Bio statisticians. I also don't have any international friends in this field. I know a lot of international people who work in IT and they are all contractors. The difference between them and my husband is that my husband recently became a citizen. He doesn't have Visas to worry about anymore. [/quote]

I can’t offer much insight into the issue of how the timing of citizenship status, his industry and professional qualifications intermingle with securing permanent work but I’m curious too. Maybe someone more familiar with what you’re sharing can do this.[/quote]

Lack of citizenship can certainly affect your ability to get a job. However, now that he’s a citizen none of that applies. Even on government applications nobody asks how long you e been a citizen (actually it would be illegal to discriminate based upon naturalization date.) His resume would be treated the same as any other American. Sure, there might be a little discrimination at the interview stage based on accent/communication skills, but this doesn’t explain an inability to find a permanent position with a very marketable degree. [/quote]

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