Reply to How to make sure DH and I are not a burden on our children someday when we are elderly?

Forum Index » Eldercare

Reply to "How to make sure DH and I are not a burden on our children someday when we are elderly?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Money. Money, money, money. Save it. All of it.

Pick an early age to give up your house and move to a retirement community that "steps up care." Like age 55. But, you can't guarantee one of you won't have a heart attack or debilitating stroke or develop a degenerative disease by then, so maybe you should move now.

Write iron-clad end-of-life agreements that say to pull the plug in almost every circumstance, and give the power to make that decision to someone other than your children.

Have no attachment to any "thing." Not your home, not art, not pictures, knickknacks, or keepsakes. Throw out as much as possible, and make it clear the kids can throw the rest away as soon as you have to move to the "independent living" area of the retirement community.

In other words, you want to GUARANTEE you won't be a burden to your kids? Then you have to be able to become disabled tomorrow and leave no loos end untied.

Or, you could just try having an open conversation with your children as you get older about being loving and caring to one another, and model that same behavior with your own parents. As someone else said, a lot of the bad feeling comes from being overworked and overwhelmed to begin with, and then there's no way to plan for every eventuality when your parents decline. And it could be YEARS of the unknown. Conversations now, where you absolve them of guilt now for not being perfect caregivers later, is probably the best thing you can do.[/quote]

55?!?!?! Are they going to allow our high schoolers to live with us in the retirement community?[/quote]

I know I was wondering about that, too.  Can't I at least wait until my youngest has graduated HS before I put myself in a continuing care retirement community?

Hell, I'm still taking beach vacations, bar hopping, going to concerts....I guess I didn't get the memo that I needed to be in assisted living just, yet.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics