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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]My H will be shopping, take a picture of something and say "I think you would look pretty in this, do you like it, i'll buy it".. I will say... sure love it or no... the straps are weird, or it looks too tight, or I look terrible in pale yellow. See... that is not passive. [/quote]

Hmmm... NP here, but this seems cute and flirty to me, but at the same time I can understand why OP is annoyed by the type of request her DH is making, i.e. why don't you buy sexy clothes from this store, or buy a sexier bathing suit, etc.  The latter requests imply OP is not dressing sexy enough, assigns *her* the job of stepping it up, and makes it a chore (the "dress sexy" request also it seems across the board, not just in the bedroom, which seems less about sex and more controlling of OP's look generally).  The first request is active--DH is doing the buying, and buying a gift to boot!--and it indicates that you already look great, so why not wear this?  So while OP's DH may have meant well, and I think it is fine to [i]desire [/i]to see your spouse wearing this or that--I too would have been annoyed by the way it's apparently being communicated.[/quote]

Oh bother with being annoyed already.  Men and women obviously communicate differently.  It is acknowledged throughout the whole thread that your husband finds you attractive and is trying enjoy having sex with you (which is more than the just doing the 1-2 pump, its the appeal, build up, etc.)  How would you feel if the shoe were the other foot? I.e. Your DH is a hunk, and you like to see him in the shirtless fireman outfit, and he gets offended when you ask?  Who else is supposed to ask? This is what makes a marriage intimate, that you can take off the veil and be open to each other.  He is being fairly vulnerable by expressing his desire.  Maybe you can work a deal - he be the fireman and you the librarian...[/quote]

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