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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not giving any advice or anything but when it comes to male and female relations their is a big disconnect and it's important for each to better understand common perspective and emotions of each side.

Successful men are driven to have multiple sex partners. They have to battle that natural instinct in order to have a organized and peaceful home life.  Under the organized and peaceful home life is a major sexual let down and feeling of inadequacy unless there has been release with a few affairs/hookers or one nighters.  Men can love their wives and family more than anything and not be phased by the affair / hookup in the least.

Women usually don't engage in extramarital sex unless it has a highly emotional bond involved. If a woman cheats, it usually means the marriage is already over and she is literally no longer in love with her spouse. A woman carries this outlook and applies it to her cheating spouse because it is the only thing she knows and cannot fathom a mans perspective and hormones.

Not making any recommendations ... But when making decisions that will gravely effect the quality of life and have extensive ramifications it is VERY important to deal with life the way it actually is as opposed to how you believe it should be.  Once both partners understand what each other deals with they could actually talk about things that would make them very close and honest.

When you think about it.. The whole "boundaries" and unspoken truths relationships people organize their lives with do not lead to closeness. There is a major wall between most spouses and in many ways the whole thing is just a monetary/management partnership with a good bit of fake posturing.[/quote]

Ok. Interesting perspective. Why do you believe that about successful men?   [/quote]

The very root of male drive is sexual. Testosterone and the drive to have sexual power is the root motivation to make money or obtain a prestigious job or image. As "The Donald" said in his book .. "Without drive you cannot be successful".  For most men the drive is sexual at its root. Men want to have sex with the most beautiful women possible and the byproduct is success in life.  Successful men also want stability, order and peace so they get married to a woman they feel is beautiful.  After about 5 years the sex gets less rewarding (this is Mother Nature ..nobodies fault) and that's when the trouble starts. Going through the motions... "Boundaries"... Not being able to be honest for fear of backlash.. A distance between partners.  A man could get a hooker .. But that could lead to std's and legal trouble. A man could have an affair which if short term he could definitely mentally handle and move on seamlessly with his wife happily believing in her unrealistic worldview and him maintaining the working partnership while not going batshit insane inside.[/quote]

Replace “man” in this post with “baby-man“. This is not how real, grown up, adult men behave.[/quote]

That is just you wanting and trying to force the world to be your fantasy. The truth is uglier and closeness and authenticity can only come from honesty between the sexes. That aura of shaming leads to emotional distance, many unspoken truths and a mechanical partnership.[/quote]

Keep your psychobabble worldview. My experience with adult men has never reflected the warped dynamic you’re talking about.   People in adult relationships don’t resort to tired gender tropes. [/quote]

That's true.  They bury it.  It's hard for most people to be authentic and talk about real deep feelings and motivations.[/quote]

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