Reply to If you and your partner wanted different #s of children, how did you come to terms with it?

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Reply to "If you and your partner wanted different #s of children, how did you come to terms with it?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why do you all portray having an only child as such a negative thing?

We both wanted 2 kids.  I got pregnant on the first try and had a healthy, happy pregnancy and delivery.  We loved parenthood so much we started TTC #2 right away before #1 was even 6 months old.  Then we were faced with secondary infertility (totally unexpected after such an easy first time around) and while we're still TTC #2 it's been 4 years now with no success, so very likely our child will be an only unless a miracle occurs.

I have come to terms with it and see many benefits in having an only child, so has my husband.  While we would have loved to have 2, it seems like it was not meant to be for us.[/quote]

Its not negative if both of you want an only child. It can be embraced and loved if for biological reasons you can't make it happen. But if you dreamed of a life with two/three/four/whatever kids and the thing that came between you and that was a spouse going back on a previous commitment then it will cause bitterness.

I would imagine that getting over your husband's refusal to TTC #2 would have been much harder then getting over a biological issue. One you can control/influence, one you cannot. [/quote]

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