Reply to Tell me about separating and divorcing with a young baby

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Don't do anything until baby is 18 months.[/quote]
Not bad advice. But follow this only if you are prepared to forgive his affair. No sense pretending a man would go that long without. 
[/quote]

Is OP's husband willing to forgive her affair too, if she has one? Because by being hostile and aggressive, he has also abandoned her "need" to have sex with someone she feels safe with.

Honestly I am sick of you men claiming then men will surely and justifiably go have an affair if the wife doesn't put out immediately, regardless of the reasons they aren't having sex (which are almost always joint reasons). It's like your last gasp to hold sexual power over women now that the tides have turned and you can't physically coerce us. [/quote]

He might forgive her affair. But she won't have one. Because she's not interested in sex and has no motivation for an affair. She has her baby and no need for a man (physically). This is part of the problem: he has a need for sex, she does not. As to "immediately put out" it's been over a year which is unforgivable.

I was not taking either side, just stating the facts. Sorry if that makes you so angry. You simply do not have a man's sex drive so you may not understand this, but it is 100% true when I say (regardless of the cause, regardless of who is "at fault") a man will not stay faithful in a sexless marriage.  Sorry but she does not get to "keep her marriage" while not having sex and expect him to be faithful. She can divorce now, or wait it out, while looking the other way.[/quote]

Ha, shows how little you know about women. Women enjoy sex. They just aren't acculturated to believe they MUST have it or deserve to have it. 
[/quote]
Ha, shows how little you know about men. Our "must have it" drive is biological, not cultural. "Deserve" is a loaded term that applies to many things. For example, nobody [u]deserves[/u] to get or stay married.  As to sex, no man (even married) [u]deserves[/u] sex from any specific women (even his wife) on any specific occasion. However, a man [u]deserves[/u] opportunity to find a willing sexual partner. If married, we'd expect his wife would (with some reasonable frequency) be a willing partner. Like you said, women enjoy sex. But if she's [u]never[/u] a willing partner, most men consider that a complete dealbreaker for the whole relationship. The marital agreement for monogamy is (in large part) premised on the partner's ongoing participation in an active sex life. If you change those operating rules, don't be surprised when your man changes other rules. For example, reject sex for a whole year and see what happens. You already know my guess.[/quote]

If you're a hostile, aggressive asshole, don't be surprised if your wife stops sleeping with you. And don't be surprised when things go very badly for you when you blow up your marriage. Women like sex; but not with hostile assholes. [/quote]

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