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[quote=Anonymous]OP - how much time do you spend with your kids?  I agree w/pp who talk about balance and well adjusted people being more important than type "A" motivated high achievers.  One thing I have noticed though is that the families that have the healthiest kids are those who do a lot together, spend time together.  Not having a parent travel tons for business, eating meals together, that kind of thing.  It matters.  It helps with academic success too since that is what you seem to greatly care about.  We read to our kids every single damn night.  We didn't force additional homework on them but we saw their weaknesses academically (ie boy who couldn't focus well but didn't have ADHD/ADD so we asked him to write 5 sentences about anything he wanted for years 2-3x/weekly which really helped him) and we worked with them for an extra 15-20 min most nights for years.  It's a lot of work.  It's a lot of time but that's what having good and happy kids is about - you HAVE TO SPEND the time.  It doesn't matter about anything else - all the trips, all the material things, it's getting to know them and creating that bond and helping them be as the pp said earlier, develop their sense of self.  We never cared where they went to college though - we care about them being well rounded and academically not failing. I think it's super important to distinguish that.  Professionally, I meet a lot of different folks from EAs to C level execs as a recruiter and the person that is well loved and good at what they do has nothing to do with academics.  Adjust your own metrics for success.  Just love your kids, be grateful they are good at some things - art, sports, that's so lucky to have kids like that - so many people who have talent in anything is rare.  They won't be like you but they may be BETTER than you! Isn't that what you ultimately want?[/quote]

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