Reply to SIL does not like our potluck Christmas plans

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here,

Thank you for your responses.  I was so upset last night I really wanted to put her on blast.  I took a screenshot of her message and texted it to my brother/her husband.  I told him he needed to handle it before I said something I would regret.  What I really wanted to do was screen shot the message and post it on FB for everyone in the group to see.  For my brothers sake I won't.  He responded right away and said how sorry he was and that SIL was totally out of line and he would handle it. [b] I responded that I did not want to hear one word out of her mouth unless it was an apology.  [/b]He replied that he does not know what has gotten into her but he will make sure I don't have to deal with her.  I am more than ok with that.

For the record back in July I could not have made it more clear I would not be responsible for the cooking.  There was no room for misunderstanding.  Everyone shook their head in agreement.  There have been no complaints from anyone else.  My sister offered to make the turkey and gravy.  I assigned my dad to make the ham and brother to bring the pies.  He could get them frozen from the grocery store for all I care.  It's not like SIL is being put out and has to slave over a hot stove for 2 days.[/quote]

[b]That's a little harsh. I would have gone with "let's not ever talk about this again". But I realize your SIL may tend toward jerkiness in general and need more rigorous treatment.[/b]
[/quote]

Not harsh, IMO (NP)
OP has opened her home and taken on the burden of hosting, year after year. Potluck aside, she is STILL taking on the burden, while still making mashed potatoes and whatever. Hosting involves cleaning, prep, schedule changes, etc. And cleaning and repairing again, long after everyone else is all snug in their beds, potluck dish in the dishwasher already. It’s fine when you are appreciated for hosting, less so when you are “expected” to do it. 
OP is 100% is the right, and does deserve an apology and a thank you for hosting all these years, and continuing to open her home. [/quote]

Oh I agree. My point is that for long-term relationships sometimes it's best to scale back the response the person deserves to get.[/quote]

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