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[quote=Anonymous]I haven't read the whole thread, OP, but I have a similar husband (I think).

One of the issues for us is that if the purchase feels "worth it" to him then he assumes this is correct.  He is not a frivolous spender, but just as an example, if he wanted a new laptop or phone, or a new suit for work, he would do some research and then buy it.  He does not feel like he has to run everything by me.  This has helped me feel more comfortable with paying for stuff I know he thinks is too expensive (haircuts being a major example for us).

I have learned to accept that he will never *not* worry about money, or that if he does, this will have nothing to do with me.  He worried when we made 1/4 what we make now, he worries now.

For the PP who said this means we'll retire early, it won't.  Seriously.  There is no chance he would retire early and lose out on the additional years of income.

We are not in your exact situation but we own cars outright, save every month, have solid college and retirement accounts, lots of equity in our home (mortgage is 1/4 of take-home).  Our bathrooms are 70 years old and not in great shape, and DH is not ready to even have a conversation about remodeling.  I have planted a seed and expect it will be another 3-4 years before it takes root.  If/when I get a grudging "fine, go ahead" I'll take it.  [/quote]

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