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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]For the PP who pulled all the stupid crap listed (e.g., making sure her XH had trouble buying Christmas gifts for her kids):  Every time you tried to hurt him you sent the message of just how hung up on him you still are.

Everyone but you can see it.  Including your kids.[/quote]

you don't know what you are talking about. I have a great relationship with my kids. They prefer me over their father. They wouldn't do that if he was a good guy. He deserves what he gets and don't try to shame me for sticking up for myself.[/quote]

If your ex is as bad of a guy as you say, none of this really hurts him, it just hurts your kids (and you.). Maybe they seem fine now, but do you think they will be able to have healthy relationships themselves after watching you do all this to yourself and them?  Consider some counseling for yourself and for them.  If you cannot let go of your anger they will wind up emotionally stunted developmentally.  Watching your kids be disappointed to be missing Christmas presents does not bring real joy.   I'm sure you had some really unfair things happen to you, but just think about the struggling parents who manage to swallow their pride and accept toys from total strangers just to avoid disappointing their kids this Christmas.  You can do better, op.  I hope you can turn over a new leaf this season.  I wish you and your kids peace.[/quote]

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