Reply to Would you give a second chance?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm a NP and I can't believe everyone is just assuming MIL was out of line.  For all we know, OP (and her mother) were extremely exclusionary throughout the event.  We already know OP and her mother are very close.  So, picture it this way:

OP invites MIL and in response to MIL probably asking about getting there, OP says "we're all going to meet there."

MIL arrives and finds everyone (including OP's DH) already there enjoying themselves.  MIL asks saying "I thought we were all meeting here?"  And OP tells her that her mom came with them.  MIL assumes DH also came with them, OP doesn't clarify.

OP's made it clear she and MIL don't have a great relationship to begin with, so imagine the group going around and OP and her mother ignoring or leaving out the MIL.  Imagine the OP going "Mom, come here, take a look at this."  "Kids, come here with [Mom] and let's go here"  "Mom, see Janie over there?  Well, I was telling you about her earlier today and blah blah blah"

The way I can envision it, OP and her mom are being complete mean girls - yet, her OP is factually correct in that she invited MIL and her and her mom drove together and then magically her MIL lost it.  So, everyone assumes that there was nothing in OP's behavior (or her mother's for that matter) that would lead to the MIL feeling left out.

OP - Obviously, I don't know if you did any of that, but it's clear you don't like your MIL and are looking for a reason to exclude her.  I mean, it didn't even occur to you to have your mom sit this festival out and have your mom go to the cider thing.  It was like you start out as fact that your mom will be going - it's just a question of whether your MIL will join you both.

I'm with the other posters that suggest you invite (and maybe drive altogether) your MIL and maybe try including her a bit more.

[/quote]

For heavens sake. This is getting absurd. For one thing, if MIL arrived last and was offended that everyone else was already there, how would she know if anyone rode together? If that's how MIL and you approach situations, it's no wonder you and she feel slighted. You're looking for drama.

I won't pick apart the rest of your post, but basically if that's how you'd start the evening, it's no wonder the rest of your post is so drama laden. Your assumptions are even more off the wall than everything else you're accusing other posters of assuming. You're essentially assuming the opposite of everything OP posted. Even if OP had been exclusionary, do you still think crying and carrying on at the kids' school was appropriate? It sounds like MIL really caused a scene. [/quote]

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