Reply to therapy or other guidance re: stopping anorexia in its tracks

Forum Index » Tweens and Teens

Reply to "therapy or other guidance re: stopping anorexia in its tracks"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
I did in fact reach out to previous family therapist on the theory that maybe she'd be the appropriate person to help me get DH on board and/or she might weigh in on the "who should I take DD to see first--a generalist who deals with the fuller panoply of teen anxiety/depression issues, which I'm guessing DD is struggling with--or straight to ED specialists." [/quote]

Please take her straight to an ED specialist.

[quote]How long she had been skipping meals (all summer). That she feels she can't quit on her own. [b]That she feels it getting much worse all of a sudden.[/b] Talked about the new exercise compulsions. [/quote]

OP once anorexia gets to a certain stage, patients can spiral further downhill very quickly in terms of physical health.   Good that she is letting you know, but she is reaching out to you for medical help.

[quote] Sadly, the 2 hour convo with HIM at midnight last night didn't go as well as my convo with her. He believes that she is "wildly exaggerating" her conduct/description of feelings bc she is getting a lot of "positive attention" from me with every "lie" or "exaggeration" she tells. Says she's having normal teenage angst/self-esteem issues and then blowing them out of proportion to be manipulative and to milk me for every last drop of attention. That this is the emotional equivalent of a 3 year's tantrums. That he's not giving in to it and I shouldn't either.[/quote]

OK.  Tell him that a child can have cancer AND be wanting attention.  A child can have diabetes and also be manipulative.   That doesn't mean that they don't have cancer or diabetes that needs to be treated, though.

[quote]Her behavior DOES seem manipulative. "I won't eat unless you make me." I will eat but only 1/4 of whatever you eat."[/quote]

This is actually AMAZING for someone with anorexia and it points to the fact that perhaps you may have an easier time helping her get better than other people.   The whole problem with anorexia is that there is something inside these kids that is telling them not to eat, and the parents need to be stronger than that voice and force the kids to eat!  If she's actually telling you she won't eat unless you make her -- that's a great start.

[quote]I was supposed to not be home last night to attend a friend's going away party. She told me she didn't want me to go. I told her it was important to me and this other person that I do go. But what ends up happening? She got "her way." She and I spent hours sitting on her bathroom floor talking about ED, etc. and I end up missing the party and staying home to be with her. (I also think it's unfair that she is basically blaming bio mom for "letting her get away" with not eating b/c mom doesn't happen to ask her the right follow-up questions, etc. and so doesn't know the extent of the problem.  )Yep. I feel ED is manipulating me. And DH. And bio mom. AND DD. But I don't believe for a second that DD is doing it on purpose or that it's controllable or that the right thing to do is to ignore it/let her cry it out of her own/not give her attention/whatever. But what do I know about any of what is "actually the truth" of this situation.[/quote]

A Maudsely trained ED Family Based Treatment therapist (NOT the same as a family therapist but someone with specific trating in family based treatment of ED) can help you deal with all of what you just wrote.

[quote]End result: fine, you can get her to a dr even though I don't believe for a second that she really has an ED. Not perfect result but it's gets us to a place where I feel I can make appointments, and drive her to appointments, and pay for appointments without actively going against wishes of DH/bio father and now, apparently, even bio mom. So.....
[/quote]

This is excellent!!  Keep on!!
[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics