Reply to Why do you let your kid run around at a restaurant?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So, from a curious FTM (of a current 3 month old): when and how does one teach their kids to sit still and quietly at restaurants? Presumably you start with practice sitting for meals at home, but at what age is it reasonable to expect your child to learn and obey this?[/quote]

It totally depends on the child. For us, it started with teaching proper manners and behavior at home. We keep our expectations reasonable based on age and any special needs, but we teach and set expectations that are enforced. As they developed age-appropriate abilities to behave, we took them out first to very casual restaurants and then, as they proved they could handle it, nicer restaurants. We also chose to go at off times before we were totally confident in our kids' behavior, so that if things got out of hand, it minimized the disruption to other diners. We also always had more than one adult there when they were young, so that if someone needed a break outside, someone else could be inside with the other child (or minding the table so they wouldn't think we'd just skipped out).

We also brought with us suitable distractions when the kids were young -- small quiet toys, coloring books/crayons, fidget toys, etc. (but no screens). My child with SN often has trouble sitting in one place for long periods of time, but has learned that it's okay stand next to the table and fidget with something, as long as he's standing out of the way of traffic. For this reason, we also will usually ask for a  table more out of the way, or that at least has a place for him to stand without interfering with others (e.g., no booths).

We didn't take them out very often between 1 and 2, but once they were over the age of two we generally were able to manage a restaurant meal using the various strategies listed above. It wasn't always easy or relaxing, but we could do it without making assholes of ourselves.[/quote]

One other thing I forgot to mention, when they were younger we only took them to restaurants with enough outside are for the to move around (e.g., sidewalks out front). Never a place where they couldn't move five feet in any direction without ending up in the parking lot.[/quote]

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