Reply to Never do a DNA test if you don't want the answers!

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Never do a DNA test if you don't want the answers!"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Wonderful story OP, please keep us informed when you get back!

Kind of a personal question... so your mom cheated on your dad then?  Or was she already pregnant when they got together?[/quote]

My mom and dad were already on rocky ground at that point.  My birth dad had an appointment at their house through his work, he had a sweet southern accent.  My mom felt alone and this sweet southern guy was giving her attention.  It was the perfect storm.  So yes, they both had an affair.

I will definitely repost after the trip.  I feel blessed.  I have no issues about how I came to be.  2 people made a bad choice but something good came of it.  :)[/quote]

That is a lovely way to view it, always keep your glass is half full view of this (as you know you'll always have naysayers who disapprove).

I hope I wasn't being too nosy when I asked about your mom cheating, this whole situation though is just so fascinating. 
Imagine if you'd never done that DNA test?? :)[/quote]

Oh, no worries!  If I was worried about it, I shouldn't have posted, you were just fine.  It's facts from 50 years ago, who cares right?  Was it right? Of course not but it happened I'm here.  I cannot cast the first stone and of all people, I'm the one most affected and I've forgiven her so I hope she can forgive herself. [/quote]

Ok, thanks.  :) 
Even though this is an anonymous site, I still always try to be as respectful as I'd want others to be towards me.

Like I said, your story is absolutely fascinating & I hope you've been documenting each detail of your journey?  
This would make for an award winning documentary, no doubt. 
Have you considered possibly writing a book after your father & their mother passes?  You can always write it under a pen name, as well.

It's truly remarkable how DNA tests can change a perception you've had your entire life within seconds.

Have you seen this wonderful video?  
I cry every single gosh darn time I watch it without fail, lol.
I've also watched each of the videos in their entirety of all of the folks within this one.

https://youtu.be/tyaEQEmt5ls

[/quote]

Yes, I also try to respect others' feelings and opinions.  You never know what they have gone through.  Anonymity does not give license for rudeness and disrespect.  So I am with you on that.

I have journaled since I started my DNA test, not exactly expecting this type of an outcome.  It was more for my children so that they could also take a journey into realizing who they are.  In all of my life, I never realized taking a DNA test would change things so dramatically.  I went through the whole range of emotions:  Disbelief, denial, anger, sadness, not knowing my true identity, forgiveness (not an emotion but putting it in there because it is key to accepting your past), anxiety (in finding my BD), joy, excitement and now anticipation.  I believe I should write a book on this and just use a pen name as I hope to give not only hope to those searching, but also helping them have the tools and knowledge that it may not go as planned.

The hardest part of all of this is realizing that the Dad that I have always known as dad is technically my step dad, though he is so very much more to me and will always be "Dad."  As you know, he is in hospice, so I go down there often, never knowing whether it will be the last time I see him.  As I look at him, I can't help but feel a little sadness over the situation yet glad that he does not know, for his sake.  I am actually a little relieved that my children did not inherit the dysfunctions of that side of the family, as there was some very serious problems on that side of the family, 4/7 of my dad's siblings and his father having very severe dysfunction in their lives due to their "disease" is all that I will call it. So the good in a crazy situation is that that is not a part of my children's DNA and that my dad has been a very loving grandfather to them. Then realizing that not only are my newly found brothers half brothers, but so are the rest of my siblings.  So I was feeling like I was just an island, until I realized I'm more like a connector between both families and am blessed to have new, loving siblings and their families in my life.  This is actually the first that I have put to words the emotional process that I went through.  I should start doing that a little more in my journaling as it was really only journaled day-to-day.  The next 2 weeks will prove to be very emotional yet filled with joy.  I will go see the grave of my BD while I am there just to make peace in my own mind.  I will get to know my brothers, sisters in law and their families.  Oh, and we will hit the beach while we are there because..........beach.  :)  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics