Reply to Girlfriend laid off five weeks ago

Forum Index » Jobs and Careers

Reply to "Girlfriend laid off five weeks ago - I'm getting concerned"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This relationship is a giant red flag. You're almost ready to move in with her but haven't talked once in five weeks about her strategy for getting a job? This is bizarre.

from your description, your gf sounds like a fun, sweet woman who you don't know all that well. If you marry her, I will hazard a guess that she'll bounce around between low paying low reward jobs for a couple years, push kids right away, justify leaving her career asap since her salary is so low, and then she'll be a mediocre stay at home mom who spends just enough of your money to make you resent her, and you'll end up having to run much of the household lest it fall into an unacceptable level of mess. After a few kids, she's tired and you're busy at work, and resentful, and you guys won't have much to talk about and divorce will soon be on the horizon. I'm calling it now![/quote]

I'm the ADD poster above and OP, I hate to say it, but this poster is spot on.  My husband does well financially, so thankfully I have help with keeping organized (I don't have a nanny or housekeeper or anything like that, but I do work with an organizational expert that helps me keep myself, our lives, my kids lives/schedules, our home lives (scheduling chores, housework for myself, meals, etc).  It helps me a great deal & my husband doesn't have any of that built up resentment, because although I'm not working (he wanted me home raising the kids) I'm still pulling my weight as it pertains to our household (although I do need a little guidance/direction in doing so).

If your HHI is high & it can support you both (and a family & mortgage one day) then great, this may not be your future.
I don't have to worry about the stress of making ends meet every month which is stressful enough, however if we did have that financial strain & stress, along with me being the unorganized/unmotivated/procrastinating mess that I can be due to my ADD, it would definitely cause a LOT more stress & SO much resentment in our relationship.

If I didn't have someone to help keep me on track & make me accountable (make & keep me accountable to myself, my husband has never given me grief about anything, ever) I'd be that EXACT mess the PP described above & so would my household... it would be one big chaotic mess & nobody likes to live in chaos.

I can admit my strengths & weaknesses and where I need help, however if she can't even see it in herself, you have a MUCH bigger problem.  
Admission is ALWAYS the first step.

This will be your future of things don't change with her & it's scary how spot on the PP is with the timeline.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics