Reply to Why do people who have kids literally drop off the face of the earth?

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Reply to "Why do people who have kids literally drop off the face of the earth?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Well, I will disagree with most on this thread and say that while I love being a mom, I still need and value my friendships. Fortunately, my friends are the same and most of us have kids. We both maintained our friendships post-kids and I consider that a good thing.

I think you need to find new friends however. My childhood best friend trivialized my single/childfree lifestyle once she had her son so I migrated to new friends. A few years later, she was upset when I wasn't there during a crisis for her. She'd lost other friendships as well. [/quote]

I'm one of the PPs you're disagreeing with and I totally maintain a lot of female friendships with a mixture of childfree friends and some friends that have a kid.

I agree its important to get outside the bubble and live your life. I also think expecting weekly dinner/art dates with a friend who is the parent of a young child is a lot and its probably coming at the expense of something like marital satisfaction or child bonding.

I don't think I could say exactly how often I do things, but I have a running text chain with a group of girlfriends and somewhat regular group dinners/weekend activities. But neither my husband or I go into the weekend with the expectation that we have a bunch of social engagements. We plan these things out in advance and it somehow works out that MOST weekends and most weeknights we're doing the family thing. It's all about balance of course.

But if I had a friend who was inviting me to two or three things a week and getting annoyed that I wasn't responding promptly enough? I would drift, I don't have time for that kind of relationship commitment outside of my family while I have young kids. It sucks but its a necessary sacrifice.[/quote]

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