Reply to Gene Hackman R.I.P.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m wondering if she even took Gene to doctors that often. Someone on the outside should have been monitoring his health. It doesn’t seem like he was getting the health care he needed. None of those pills found dealt with his heart disease. He only had a pacemaker. I could go on.

I hope this was not deliberate, but feel that she could have done far more for him. I think if doctors knew about the advanced dementia ( she probably hid it), then they would have been adamant about getting home resources for him, or suggest a memory care facility for him. It’s a tough thing to do, but we went both routes with my parents. Having care at home gave us more time with one parent, and saved a little cost, though home care is not cheap.

Memory care facilities are expensive, but help you gain your life
 back. 
[/quote]

PP who called Arakawa negligent and I stand by this statement. She sounds like a control freak nightmare. I’m certain she didn’t share Gene’s diagnosis with his adult children (clearly the one DD who claimed her dad was in great health and did yoga was happy to buy into the delusion) and maybe being in denial herself, just went ahead and lived her life to include prioritizing her dogs’ care, health and well-being g above her own husband’s.[/quote]

Maybe… but he was 95 so either had great genes or someone looking out for him.

Total anecdote and I am biased but… DH and I joke that my stepmother (20 years younger than my ailing elderly father) is doing the bare minimum with his care because she’s ready for him to kick it so she can live her life free as a bird, with a healthy inheritance. I’ve tried to set up care for him many times but she refuses. [/quote]

My grandmother died at 101 and had full-blown dementia for the last decade of her life. She had no serious medical concerns, was ambulatory, toileted independently, and would calmly sit and watch tv for most of the day. She needed to be kept safely indoors and directed to meals, but that was pretty much it. Accounts suggest Gene was quite healthy and may have only needed minimal support and direction, meals prepared, and so on. Seems that his wife was handling everything just fine until she fell ill quite suddenly. Surely she supposed it was the flu and she'd recover sooner rather than later, was able to run errands the day she died. Deeming her negligent is uncalled-for.[/quote]

PP and no, no physician would ever recommend that a patient with advanced dementia EVER be left alone! Negligent![/quote]

DP. My neighbor is a caregiver and she leaves her charge with dementia for a few hours at a time but the old lady is immobile. Not sure about Gene[/quote]

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