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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Everyone was was dressed in casual, jeans, kakis normal casual Thanksgiving attire. Host's made their exaggerated entrance wearing a sleeveless floor length gown (it's 20 degrees in the midwest) and her husband a suit. (She usually carries her husbands balls in her purse so he has no say even though he's the smart one). They are legends in their own mind. This spans decades.

The constant bragging about their daughter making the entire meal herself was too much."Everything was made from scratch." "She's SOOO GIFTED." And how tired she was getting exhausted hugs from her siblings. WE WERE ALL HUNGRY. There was turkey, rolls, and cranberry that's pretty much it. There wasn't much too eat or too many choices really. But host has an eating disorder so the rest have to starve too. [/quote]

My SIL is a dress-up-for-thanksgiving gal, too. Sequined dress and tights, she made BIL wear a suit and tie and dress shoes. These are people who work blue collar jobs, think pharmacy tech and landscaper.

She actually had the audacity to ask DH "why are you dressed so sloppy? It's thanksgiving!" DH was wearing a nice flannel shirt and jeans and moccasins, at thanksgiving, in his own mother's house, where nobody dresses up. DH said, "well I wear a tie to work, so I'd rather be comfortable at home."

[/quote]

You know you’re coming off as really snobbish, right? Maybe people with more casual jobs like the idea of dressing up for the holidays. Some families do. I mean, she was rude to chastise your DH for being “sloppy,” but you sound classist. [/quote]

Better to be classist than to be classless enough to badger someone in their own home about their sartorial choices.

DH didn't say that to be mean. She asked him why he was dressed "so sloppy" and he answered honestly.

Throughout the dinner, SIL made a ton of comments about how MIL was doing everything wrong and needed to do things like "use a classier tablecloth" (she meant buy a shiny paper one from party store vs heirloom tablecloth) and how she should have just used all disposable paper products for serving/eating instead of the fancy family china plates, and how MIL should just pick up all the food from a caterer next time instead of "wasting all day cooking" (MIL takes a lot of pride in her cooking and it's good.)

I don't know if it's a social class issue or a SIL issue--I cannot imagine showing up as a guest in someone's home and criticizing the heck out over everything in a super concern-trolling kind of way.[/quote]

Its textbook insecurity/self-loathing and/or envy, depending on the context. [/quote]

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