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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Pp with teen and tween. [b]I’m not sure what amount of pushing [/b]can get your kid to the finish line. I was and am a very involved parent. I was on the pta, did snacks for soccer, volunteered for swim team, did cub scouts and Girl Scouts, let my kids do robotics, ballet, cheer, hip hop, musical theater, chess, model UN, debate, science olympiad, spelling bee, anything and everything they were interested in.

My almost 13yo will barely take the trash out. There is absolutely no way to get a kid who isn’t motivated or has the will to do said activity.

I have spent the past decade taking this kid to children’s museums, science museums, reading together, playing board games, going on hikes, visiting national parks and all I could do to try to enrich this kid.

DH says we have good kids. It is up to them. I can’t force them to do anything. I will sometimes catch them dosing off and I can barely get them to brush their teeth or take out the trash. No way would they compete at some high level whether it is a sport or academics because the mom pushed them. I will offer supports if they need but I can’t force anything at this point.[/quote]

You have done a lot for your kids but very few would actually count as pushing. You were not supposed to have your kid "do anything and everything they were interested in". That's not pushing... that's spoiling, actually. Museums, reading tighter, hikes etc - that's not pushing it, either. Those are just good time you had together. You call that enrichment, find, but enrichment and pushing are very different things.[/quote]

I mentioned my almost 13yo who I am struggling with now.

I also have a kid in high school who is an academic superstar. I also don’t push him. He does everything on his own. I parented them the same but their outcomes will likely be vastly different.

DH reminds me that our current high school kid also didn’t so much in middle school as it was during Covid. My friends tell me that my middle kid is the normal one and my high school kid is the abnormal one.[/quote]

Your older kid doesn't require pushing. Your 13 yo does, apparently. You haven't pushed either, and that worked for #1 but not #2.[/quote]

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