Reply to Come here if your in laws do weird crap at thanksgiving.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]DH just told MIL for the third time that no, we won’t be putting food on the table and passing. We’ll be serving it buffet-style from the island. She’s fighting her on this and he finally said, “No one wants to pass and pass and monitor what each other is or is not eating. We all just want to make a plate and eat.” Which has always been MY argument for hating family-style service.

(Nelson voice:) Ha ha![/quote]

Nice! My MIL also refuses to understand that[b] passing family style is no longer a popular way of serving[/b]. And I agree that one of the main motivations for old people liking it is that they like to see who is taking what and how much. [/quote]

really? what do you do on a daily basis? and do people really care about seeing what other people eat (that seems odd and slightly disordered)[/quote]

NP. On a daily basis, we put food on the island, and either self-serve or one adult serves for the kids or whatever. Occasionally DH and I will ask the other if they want us to make them a plate. But mostly, everyone makes their own plate.

Anyway, I see you’ve never been part of an interminably long pass, pass, pass, pass holiday dinner. They are the WORST. A huge casserole dish hovering in midair while Aunt Bertha hems and haws about whether she wants this dish or that. Or MIL asks why you aren’t eating mashed rutabagas. Or FIL says “wow, you’re taking a LOT of mashed potatoes.” So much commentary about who is eating what and how much, or how no one is eating the yams and you really need to take some yams. Meanwhile the food is getting cold instead of being eaten. It’s so laborious and unnecessary. [/quote]

We pass food around and this kind of thing never happens.[/quote]

My in laws always did the pass thing and the food was always cold. We did it ourselves this year and the food was cold.  It's problematic if you have a lot of people. My mil is an extremely controlling person and watched every portion a person took. They expect everyone to finish everything on their plate. The first time I ate with them when I was dating my now dh, my sil lectured me loudly at the table that I didn't finish three grains of corn. No one stopped her. She also lectured me because I didn't cross myself after they said grace. The fool didn't know that's a Catholic thing. My dh's family is unfailingly rude. [/quote]

Food gets cold at the same rate when it’s sitting on an island in the kitchen as when it’s on the dining room table, unless the dishes are on an actual heat source of whatever type. The laws of physics apply in both places.
 [/quote]

You cannot possibly be this dense.

Buffet in the kitchen - everyone lines up at once, fills their plates with each item, eats. Hot food.

“Family style” - every individual item passed around many people at a family table, everyone waits for it to be passed every single item by item while people either about how much to take. Lukewarm food at best.

Glad I could help.[/quote]

NP. [b]I simply disagree. The food will also get cold while you stand in the buffet line to serve yourself[/b], unless the food is in chafing dishes over heaters. One way is not superior to the other. Also, even if you serve buffet style, I can look over at Cousin Max’s plate and see that he has taken a pound of mashed potatoes and no Brussels sprouts, and confront him about his hatred of green vegetables, should I so choose.[/quote]

Mmkay, but you’ll still be wrong. Shrug.[/quote]

She’s not wrong. Unless your family all has really short arms and needs to get up every time a dish is passed?  Or maybe no arms at all?  There is no significant time difference when getting food buffet style vs. family style. If you have 20 people for the meal the last guy in the buffet line will get the lukewarm food you are trying to avoid. [/quote]

Chafing dishes, is how normal people keep food warm on a buffet[/quote]

The vast majority of people are not serving their family dinners from chafing dishes.[/quote]

For holiday dinners? Absolutely. I have three.[/quote]

My mom had warming trays and a double oven. My mil has chafing dishes. We tend to do a buffet style unless it’s only 4-6 peeps, food is kept warm either way. When there are small children family style can be cumbersome. [/quote]

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