Reply to Au Pair just asked for more money

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Reply to "Au Pair just asked for more money"

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[quote=Anonymous]To the anti-au pair crusaders: can you at least admit there is a wide variety of experiences? The ones cited in litigation working 60-75 hours a week are absolutely shameful and exploitative. I think you have probably even seen on this thread there are a lot of complex racial/socioeconomic factors at play both in the part of the host families and the au pairs.

On one hand, you might have au pairs coming from developing nations who see this as an opportunity to make money and may match into a host family where she is expected to work 45 hours a week doing all childcare for two or more kids, never gets any “extras” etc. Other au pairs coming from Western Europe tend to see this as a fun gap year experience and their aim is not to make money but is to spend it all on travel, partying and seeing as much of the US as possible. For them, this is “fun money” because they aren’t worried about saving it. The latter is where my au pairs falls.

On the host family spectrum - there are military / single parents and families with like 5+ children who may see this as cheap childcare. Some may lean hard into the cultural aspect as well, or may not. Sometimes you see nickel and diming as some are obviously more budget conscious. On the other hand, you have the host families for who this is a cool cultural exchange experience, who love the flexibility, who may or may not use their au pairs for less than 45 hours a week, and pay a bunch of extra monetary bonuses / vacation perks.

Mine hangs out with a toddler all day who takes a long nap - during that two hours she generally facetimes her family, is on her phone, etc. sometimes I will send her activity ideas for toddler and she’ll make crafts. She facetimes her family with my toddler too and they are always playing around with Snapchat filters which the toddler finds hilarious. I think it’s sweet that her family knows my kids and I do not care that my toddler gets this type of “screen time.” She will often take my toddler to a park or go for a walk and grab coffee with her friend who works a split shift so is free during the day. She doesn’t work weekends, ever. When grandparents used to come visit in the before times she would get bonus time off. I am not micromanaging her day to day with my toddler and they adore each other. I would bet that people paying $25-$30 for a nanny would expect a whole lot more than this and want their nanny to never touch their phone when the baby is around.

Her friends come over and hang out with the kids before and after dinner on the weekends on occasion. It is so crazy absurd for people to be acting like this is modern day slavery. Not all of her friends have great situations but they have all managed to save enough money to travel pretty extensively. She’s been to probably 20+ states in the year or so she has been here, because they travel like college kids - road tripping with 8 people in shared hotel rooms. I look fondly back on those days in my early 20s. This is not a career for them. [/quote]

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