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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]NP here - at what $$$ value WOULD you litigate?  I see all these comments thrown out here like “it’s not worth it for under $10 million”. But personally, what would be worth litigating to you?

My narcissistic ex is difficult to mediate with because of his personality disorder and the associated issues. Mediation might cost me $1-3 million dollars (before legal fees). So what’s the actual line?

Not trying to hijack the thread, but this seems relevant for OP too.
[/quote]

I’m the PP who made the $10m comment. Our STBXs may have similar problems. I think that if you mediate with a personality disorder, you need to be ready to give them tangible wins. You need attorney who understands this kind of mindset and how will impact your strategy.

Unfortunately I’m in a state that mandates mediation before trial so there’s an incentive for people to load up with a bunch of motions prior to mediation to set precedent with the intent that mediation will fail and precedent will be used to establish a status quo that may guide the outcome of the trial and settlement.

If I were in a state where mediation was optional or if I decided to convince STBX to pursue it as our man route towards settlement, I would definitely lose a lot of money just to make STBX feel like he was “winning” on other terms.

Our total net worth is probably $4m. In order to get agreeable custody terms and divide up certain assets in a way that makes the most sense for me tax-wise and for the long term given my lower earning potential, I would probably have to give up my share of equity from a vacation house and a specific brokerage account. For him to get those would make him think he was getting a big win over me, and I would probably have $1m less than him in the settlement, but I would get more that matters to me in the long term.[/quote]

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