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[quote=Anonymous]Because you told him he was jealous of his friends, compared his situation due to age to your situation due to academic performance (which is loaded with your own self judgment) and projected it onto him. You took up all the space and decided for him how he felt and what it is comparable to. You could have said “I’m so sorry. I remember feeling lonely in college. College gets so hyped but it is also a hard time with many growing pains.” And then just listened to him. If you did mention your college experience it would have been best to say “I remember feeling very lonely in college. This is quite different but all my friends went to a few schools together and I went to one by myself. They continued to hang out together but I really struggled to make friends. Eventually I met xyz. Don’t give up and hang in there.” Communication takes mindfulness and a gentle finesse with how you frame things.[/quote]
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