Reply to Hung up on the idea that toxic STBX husband will be the perfect husband for some 25 year old girl

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Reply to "Hung up on the idea that toxic STBX husband will be the perfect husband for some 25 year old girl"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]op - the thing driving this question in your head is the idea that someone else - younger, prettier, more naive, more trusting, more vulnerable, more optimistic might 'bring out the better side' of your dh. But the idea of a person being their better self due to the nature of their partner is a fantasy. No one ever became a better self BECAUSE of another person. No matter how stunningly hot and amazing (case in point - angelina/ megan fox/ miranda kerr - i could go on). People become better selves because they work on themselves. Sadly, a lot of the 'work on themselves' happens because of an experience with a prior partner, which is what leads to the idea that the new partner is better suited to this person. But it's just that humans live and learn and in an ideal situation they grow as a result of challenges. So yes your dh might improve himself for his next partner due to your separation but he also might not! It's not going to be a case of him having zero growth and zero revelations and someone else just being more 'right'. [/quote]

This is the best comment and advice for OP hands down. [/quote]

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