Reply to Women whose partner's make enough for them to stay home, why do you prefer working?

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Reply to "Women whose partner's make enough for them to stay home, why do you prefer working?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?[/quote]

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do. [/quote]

I’m always surprised when people say this.  I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school.  I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.  [/quote]
You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me![/quote]

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.  
But yeah, it isn’t that different.  
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own.  I don’t have to bring stickers.  
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.  
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper.  (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.  [/quote]

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything. [/quote]

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty. [/quote]

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.[/quote]

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day. [/quote]
So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools. [/quote]

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate. [/quote]

I guess you are attacking me and my five hours. I am a high functioning person. I spent most of my life achieving. I have two masters, one from Harvard. I was ambitious and careeer oriented. My entire identity was with my achievements and I did achieve. Then I had children and I hated being at work. I wanted to be with my child. I mommy tracked and had another kid. I had a nanny. I was able to juggle work and kids but I did not feel like I spent enough time with my children. Those years when they were young are gone.

I used to make a lot of money while making money for others. DH also makes a lot of money. He makes a few million per year. While I stopped working before I hit seven figures, I earned high six figures. We don’t need both of us out there earning all this money.

I consider myself retired. I have my own money. I have family money. We have marital assets. The last thing I need to do is go out and get a job just to have a job. I certainly don’t need to get a job to prove to some internet strangers that I can manage my time. [/quote]

DP
I couldn't get through your post because I was laughing too hard.  Are you really trying to convince anonymously that you have 2 masters and a degree from Harvard?!?!?  I mean I don't care about your choice to stay home or not, but your post doesn't read Harvard grad.  Maybe you should get back out there and sharpen the saw, because you sound dumb and defensive.  Alternatively just own where you are and stop defending yourself with lies.[/quote]

I am not defensive at all. I don’t have to attack other people online.

If you love your work and job, good for you. I personally would rather be home than work. Instead of retiring when I’m old and gray, I can enjoy my life now.[/quote]

She says "I'm not defensive at all."

She also says "I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left."[/quote]

Is that being defensive, or is that a description of how she uses her time?[/quote]

Sigh. Take the comment in context. It was clearly defensive. She wasn't being asked on a survey how she spends her time. She's responding to a post about women who work (which, by the way, she doesn't, so she didn't have anything to add to this conversation at all yet decided to jump in and offer her unsolicited advice anyway). It's clearly defensive. [/quote]

I’m not sure if you referring to me. I am the I have 5 hours per day poster. When I had my first child, I had a very demanding job. I worked 60+ hours and Dh also worked 60+ hours. We were a very career oriented couple. I missed much of my first child’s first few years of life. I mommy tracked and had a 40 hour per week job when I had my second child. I used to have a FT nanny plus preschool. I thought I was at the finish line when my oldest started kindergarten. It actually was infinitely worse with sports and after school activities. My mistake was letting go of my FT nanny thinking we didn’t need her with 2 kids in school full time. I tried to hire a PT nanny and when I was writing the job description, I decided it was everything I wanted to do with my kids. I wanted to get kids to school. I wanted to pick them up, give them a snack, help them with homework and drive them to their activities.[/quote]

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