Reply to Superbowl halftime - scantily dressed women and very covered up men

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I was conflicted.

Both women are beautiful and in amazing shape. They have every right to perform as they see fit, and the performance was undeniably entertaining. I loved Shakira and but thought that J-Lo's performance was not as good. I also felt it was too overtly sexual for my taste. But that's just me. I guess I don't see over the top sexuality as empowerment.

The reaction of my 14 year old son was interesting. He found the show to be "confusing" and "uncomfortable."  He said that they talk constantly at school about not objectifying women, but he thought that the performers were objectifying themselves. We had the usual "it is never ok to touch"conversation and I emphasized that dress or dance don't mean that a woman is "slutty." Each woman can present herself as she sees fit.  He gets that. But his very sincere question was basically why, if women don't want to be viewed for their body parts, do they choose to put them on display in such an in your face way? He said, in not exactly these words, that it was almost like you couldn't see each as a talented performer because the emphasis was on body parts.[/quote]

This is what you should say to your son... stop sexualizing women, their dress does not cause that. Dancers... ballarinas, trapeze artists, volley ball players... they wear very little/tight/revealing clothes. Stop making the outfit about sex. That is something that he is choosing to do. Belly Dancers move the same way... if you choose to think about sex when they dance that is on you. His reaction is extremely immature.

They are not in your face, it is his choice to sexualize a woman based on how she is dressed. He can choose better and his actions and reactions are his own, not caused by others.

They did not emphasize body parts HE emphasized body parts, he missed the art/athleticism/talent... that is on him.[/quote]

Seriously???  You are insane.  This is why young men can't figure the world out.  No way. They emphasized their body parts, they opted to have bare butts, to use a strip pole.  J Lo's  entire performance was about sex.

It is completely different from athletes and we have had extensive discussions about this. Context matters. Just as it is appropriate for a woman to use pole dancing, it would not be appropriate for an elementary school teacher to demonstrate her fitness skills for her class.  [/quote]

Seriously? YOU are insane.

My kids do not look at them and think sex ... they think athleticism, amazing dancing, great music, fun, entertaining.

Yes, context matters... this was not a stip club, this was a athletic show. She shows how athletic she is, how amazing she can dance and entertain.

Nobody was thinking sex... except for a bunch of boys with moms who have taught them a woman's body is only for sex.

[/quote]

Humans are sexual beings. I highly doubt your teens will never look at a human with any sexual interest or have any sexual desires. The human race would have died out eons ago if men didn't look at women are sexual beings. People can choose to emphasize or not emphasize the sexual side of themselves in how they present themselves. This can be done through words, outfits, dance moves etc. If someone wants to be sexualized and acts in a very sexualized way, there is nothing wrong with them being sexualized. Tons of people were thinking about sex. That is human nature. You seem completely void of common sense. Thinking about someone's body in a sexual way when they are putting themselves out there in a sexual way doesn't mean that woman's body is only about sex it just means that at that moment that is focus they are presenting. [/quote]

If you don't get it you will not get it. [b]You were socialized to believe that anytime a curvy woman of color moves her hips and wears less clothes... it is about sex.[/b]

It is so deeply ingrained in your subconscious you don't even see that is a learned response you can unlearn if you choose to do so.

This is why women can go topless elsewhere and not be sexualized, because their society did not teach people to sexualize everything.

You just will never get it.

My teens do not equate a 1/2 time show with sex. They know J.Lo and Shakira are at a job and doing a damn amazing job. NO. They did not sexualize them.

My kids can appreciate an amazing looking body without making it about sex. [b]Plus J.Lo is f'ing 50 you think teens are sexualizing moms... gross, what is wrong with you and your kid[/b].[/quote]

JLo was sexualizing herself. Plain and simple. If you don't see that, you really are naive. Any person (regardless of color) wearing next to nothing and gyrating/dancing provocatively is going to make people think of sex. That's not a socialized thing, it's an instinctual thing. We are animals at our base designed to reproduce. Certain cues are going to signal that, that's human nature. You really are dense if you can't see the association. [/quote]
Why do you care so much? [/quote]

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