Reply to When to tell kids the truth about their father’s adultery as reason for divorce

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Because I want nothing to damage my kid’s relationship with my ex.

I don't understand why your need to help your ex trumps your own relationship with your kids and your own relationship with yourself. Why do you keep needing to help your ex? If the kids see him/her on their own and you made the divorce not about them what difference does it make? I really don't understand how hiding something someone did helps anyone. This is where we differ. If we really want our children to accept us as who we are and accept themselves as who they are, we have to actually be who we are.[/quote]

I am on the side of not sharing. But I agree with this. I am not covering for a lying bastard.

If I don't tell, it's because I don't want to sound like the world is coming to an end( which is the way I would feel in the moment), and scare or scar my children even more.

"He hurt me badly, so i dont want to live with him anymore. We are moving on and making some changes to redefine the family dynamics now that we are in separate houses. We will all be fine. We might struggle some, but we will be fine."

If I could tell them the above with a straight face, I will. I believe this objectively, but I am not sure I will feel this way in the first couple of years if my DH chested. And I wouldn't want to make it sound like their lives are over because their father cheated. There are plenty of children living in broken homes who are living their best lives.[/quote]

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