Reply to Is it normal to take multiple vacations but never visit family?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My IL's do this.  It's fine if you don't want to visit, but stop saying that family is important to you or that you love us.  I certainly can't say it back.  Just admit that you would rather do something else, and you don't care about, or really even know, your family.  Why keep up the ruse?[/quote]

OP here, and this these are my thoughts. Why say family is important, and that the kids/cousins spending time with each other and develop a relationship is important, but not but action to words? It does seem like a ruse more and more. The weeks and weeks of vacations are fine, but then own it. And when we visit (planned way in advance), they also always seem to have other things planned/double-booked and we barely see them. I get people wanting to do their own thing but this seems much. Other family members are more reciprocal.

Also no, I'm not the person who talked about their SIL - that was someone else entirely.

[/quote]

Where do you live? I think location is key. When we lived in NYC, we had visitors ALL the time. Now that we live in DC, not so much.

Why don't you suggest a trip to the Caribbean together? No reason to be passive aggressive.

You also stated that when you visit them, you see multiple family members. Do they also have multiple people to visit when visiting you? If they have those local family members and you already visit a few times a year, that may be sufficient. Plus they may value family and local family gatherings is enough for them.

Grandparents visit us often. Siblings not so much.[/quote]

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