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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My 21 year old brother came out as gay at the thanksgiving lunch table with 33 people family extended family in the room, no advance warning. Now my mom (heart of indiana, devout, religious) is crying and my east coast cousins are cheering him on for being "brave". I need to get out of here.... [/quote]
Selfish jerk.   He owed it to his mom to tell her before hand, and give her some time to process this.[/quote]

From a gay person. [/quote]

Why does he owe his mother anything regarding his sexuality?[/quote]

NP here.  She raised and cared for him.  The least he can do it not spring major news at her over the holiday table in front of everyone.  He knows very well that she's a die-hard conservative and that it will be difficult to process.  Why make her do it there in front of the entire clan?  The least he can do is give her a week, or at least a couple of days, heads-up on the news so that she can prepare for how to react in front of her family.  She may initially be very shocked and unsupportive but given some time will be very supportive.  Instead this is like a public Punk'ed episode to see how she'll react.  No good to do to someone who bore and raised you.  It's rude and has nothing to do with his sexuality, but just giving her courtesy before he drops a bombshell on the family.[/quote]

This sounds like projection to me. I think he must have done it purely for self-preservation and protection. He's the one opening himself up to his family's  prejudices and possible bad treatment. [/quote]
Self preservation would be to tell parents over the phone, and be ready to hang up and let them process for a couple of hours, and then call again to let the news slowly sink in.
Not dumping it on them without warning in front of an audience at a holiday meal.
[/quote]

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