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Tweens and Teens
Reply to "13 yo ran away for independence "
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would not send a troubled kid to Wilderness therapy. Period. Injuries and death? Rampant abuse and no oversight? Staff from boot camps and correctional institutions? No standards or long term studeies supporting this type of therapy? No licensing or regulation? And given the lack of formal oversight, I especially would not send a young girl, who is a high risk of sexual abuse. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wilderness_therapy http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/08/when-wilderness-boot-camps-take-tough-love-too-far/375582/ 40% of kids who graduate from these programs end up in long term residential care? That's a terrible outcome. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wilderness_therapy http://astartforteens.org/dangers-of-teen-wilderness-programs https://consumer.healthday.com/encyclopedia/children-s-health-10/misc-kid-s-health-news-435/death-trip-648083.html http://www.nbcnews.com/news/other/camps-troubled-kids-can-be-magnets-abuse-f8C11409077 I have a daughter with ADHD and anxiety who is 12. I would never in a million years do this. She works with a good psychiatrist, a good therapist for mindfulness and CBT, and we worked with the school to develop a 504 plan. You know-- safe, accepted mainstream therapy that Under parental supervision, that allows her to sleep in her own bed. She is also an A student. She also has lots of friends and activities. She is even on a robotics team. Difference is? When she is upset, she communicates with us, instead of running away. I can only imagine that If I sent her away from home to an unlicensed facility with no formal oversight run by boot camp instructors, she, too, would have "abandonment" issues and start running away from home. She would also (rightfully) hate me. Although she might be too afraid to say so, because she wouldn't want to be shipped away again. Your poor child. Get your DD real help of the the medication and mainstream therapy variety. The poor impulse control that leads a young teen to run away from home (and get herself kicked out of the house and sent to Wilderness therapy) is headed in a direct line to sex, drugs, self-harm, suicide attempts, and other forms of "acting out" that happen with kids who have impulse control issues. Frankly, your kid deserves a lot better that what you are giving her. No wonder she is so screwed up. [/quote] Clearly, you have suffered some sort of trauma in a program - and I'm really sorry about that. But, you can't issue a blanket judgement on all programs. Abuse can happen anywhere which is why, as parents, we have to do our due diligence. For example, I've pulled my 7th grade DS with SNs out of PE and do not plan to have him ever take it again. Based on the experience my older DS and DD had in MS PE classes, I had no confidence that he wouldn't be bullied. My older kids are NT and well liked. If they had such negative experiences, I have good reason to believe my younger would experience worse. Yet, I'm not advocating that every parent of a child with SN pull their kid out of PE. [/quote] Nope.. never been in one of these programs myself, never suffered program related trauma. But I do keep up to date through my job on best practices for adolescent treatment through my job. So I do know this: your psychologist, psychiatrist and most inpatient treatment programs (except "sober living houses," which are also dubious) need to be licensed, have credentialed staff, and have oversight/ accreditation. -- "Wilderness therapy" does not in most cases. Any quack can run one, with zero accountability to any sort of professional oversight. Most kids who go in are vulnerable, and the lack of oversight and accountability makes them more so. A tween girl is incredibly at risk-- because she is often isolated from parents with all contact cut off and has no way to protect herself or report if she is abused by an older male "camper" or a "counselor." Even if there is no sexual abuse, many of these programs employ harsh scared straight tactics that amount to abuse-- forced running, marching, extreme physical labor, withholding food, being yelled at, shamed, and called names. Being forced to sleep outside without adequate shelter and bedding. Kids have been seriously injured in these programs. Sexual abuse has been documented. Some have died. And there is no empirical data that these programs work. The mom here says that that this is so much better than inpatient care (which would have licensing, oversight, monitoring, accreditaion and staff with real degrees). But studies show there is almost a 50% chance that her daughter will end up in long term, inpatient care after "graduating" from one of these programs (as opposed to the short term stabilization, that might have helped with the original problem in lieu of Wilderness therapy). [b]And, BTW, wildness therapy is used for the worst of the worst, end of the line kids, whose parents have exhausted conventional treatment and have no where else to turn- older (16+) hardcore junkies, kids expelled from school, in trouble with the law, and kids whose parents have no other option short of jail. You do not want your 12 year old DD thrown into that. [/b] Mom may very well have done long term, irreparable damage to her kid. And if a 13 year old (!!!) Is running away, it's clear that Wilderness therapy did not "cure" her kid-- and may have made it much worse problem long term. I feel so sorry for this child, whose mom seems opposed to finding good, mainstream psych care and exploring meds. I I feel strongly about this because I have a DD his age. And, knowing what I know, there is nothing on this earth that would convince me to put her in one of these program. I feel so sorry for this kid whose mom took the looney toon way out, rather than keeping her at home, and working with accepted methods of therapy to help her child. Maybe it's just easier toss the kid away and not have to deal with her. Mom does not deserve love and hugs. Someone needs to tell he she is at risk of damaging her kid for life. [/quote] I think this is a very valid concern. What other kind of kids will be in the program and what are their issues and how influenced is one's child by others. These programs are not likely to turn anyone away and will likely claim to help any kid regardless of whether they really could or not. I think they do help kids but if it was my child, I would not send them to something like this at the age of 13. At this point, I would actually try keeping them home, if no local providers then find ones that are willing to do skype sessions and yes, travel to the farther out providers as needed as well. I would take a leave of absence from work to stay home for a few months to accomodate.[/quote]
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