Reply to Two weeks to go and DS is shooting himself in the foot!!

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not knowing how the kid will pay for college IS a parenting fail.

Not saying it has to be YOU that pays.

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I think every family approaches this differently. Most parents set up college funds for their kids expecting to pay all or part of college expenses. I think it's part of the parenting role, but not everyone agrees.

The big surprise for me is how inflated college costs have become during the last 20 years. The money we saved will not cover anything close to the cost of private colleges. In-state colleges are more affordable, but they are huge, and that's not what my child wants. Finding an affordable SLAC is difficult, even with a high-achieving kid.

That's why, for us, merit aid is essential. We don't qualify for much, if any, FA at most private colleges. So all the TT schools that don't offer merit aid are out for our kids. We're looking at lower-ranked colleges that accept at least half their applicants, but are good, small colleges. Most of these do offer merit aid.

(A few private colleges -- GW, Hamilton, U of Chicago, and others -- offer full-ride merit scholarships to a handful of kids with incredible records academic and otherwise. I know a kid who got one of these. She was at the top of her class, did some amazing things outside of school, could have gotten into any college in the US, Stanford included. My kids do well in school, but they are not super-high achievers, so those scholarships are not within their reach.)

We've told our kids we will not allow them to take out loans, and that we'll pay the equivalent of in-state tuition for four years. We expect them to get scholarships and merit aid if they want to go to private colleges, or go to CC if they don't have the grades to get scholarships and merit aid and private schools.

My kids never expected to work their way through college, as a PP suggested her kids will. But if that's your family's choice, that's fine for you, and it's a good plan if your kids agree to it. 
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