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[quote=Anonymous]I posted in the thread earlier about my niece and the OD.  I am still thinking about your DD and I felt I had to write more.

Your DD sounds like a very caring person.  This is a wonderful quality and I'm sure you're very proud of her.

However, she is in way over her head here.  I know you are frustrated by the college's seemingly uncaring responses to your questions, but the truth is you have no idea how the school is supporting the roommate.  They can't, by law, answer your questions.  They can't answer your daughter's questions about what the school is doing for the roommate.  I hope they are doing something, but it isn't for you to know.

The college can support your daughter however.  If she chooses to seek counseling and help on how to step back from this situation, they should support her in that.  No wonder she has no time for counseling if she's traveling 40 miles round trip every day.  Your daughter's concern is a wonderful thing, but this is bigger than she can handle.  She has to let the professionals do their job her.

Encourage her to speak to counseling services on how to set boundaries and step back.  If you can't convince her to go, go up and see her in person and try to convince her.

I can understand that other posters in this thread feel shocked about the school not notifying the roommate's parents, but that is really the way the law works.  It is not appropriate for you to notify the parents.

Your DD deserves to have a real college life on her own.  She needs to live her own college life.  Maybe she can visit from time to time, but your daughter's life at college has to come first.

FERPA can be very frustrating to parents.  Everyone with a college student should read up on it.  [/quote]

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