Reply to I don't love my husband and don't think I ever did

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My husband and I have two children together. The youngest is 4 months. I do not feel like I love my husband anymore. Not sure if I ever did. We had happy moments but nothing that swept me off of my feet. We married, had children, have stable jobs, and blah blah blah. We did what we were supposed to do. However, something is missing. There is no spark. There is no flame. What do I do if there was never a flame? I rather spend time with the kids than with him. Do not get me wrong though... He is a good guy. Not mean, a good provider, and all that good stuff. What am I missing that I desire? I have no post partum depression. I love my kids, enjoy going out, being with co workers.... It's just him. I'm angry at myself for not loving him like I should when he has done nothing. We are highly sexual people and have sex all of the time so that is not it. Advice?[/quote]
This is me.

We NEVER had that spark but he is a great guy who treats me so well. I have never wanted to jump his bones. Its not his fault. He is perfect. 
[/quote]

Me too unfortunately. [/quote]

As a DH who wonders if he is on the other side of this, I wonder, have any of you DWs told him this is how you feel?  Has he asked?  Sometimes I think I'd be better off if she were just honest with me about things.  It gets hard trying endlessly to rekindle a fire that maybe was never there in the first place.....[/quote]

OP here. But would you want to truly know? Do you want to be told that your wife doesn't love you? I never understood what people meant by "we just grew apart." I just felt it was a bs answer but now that is my answer. I suppose we could do more date nights but I don't even want to put in that effort. Our communication will be minimum. Our affection will be minimum. [/quote]

I don't understand how you can say you are having sex all the time with him but don't feel any attraction or spark? That makes no sense to me. Is it just duty sex on your end? The poor guy probably thinks things are great.[/quote]

This is me too, and it sucks. DH is a great guy and a good dad. We have two kids, have been married for 8 years. Have sex 3-4 times a week, because it feels good to have sex, not because I want him in particular. I do not want date nights for the same reason as above. What's wrong with us?[/quote]

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