Reply to When your friends live large and you feel like a loser . . .

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here -- I was wallowing needlessly. And yes -- I DID change the non-relevant details though I'm fairly sure they aren't reading here.

I realize I have it pretty good too -- it's just when you see people who have always shirked work in a[b] $4 million home[/b] that you'll never have no matter how hard you work, you wonder why you work so hard . . . . But I realize my financial decisions are my own and I'm in a 1 bedroom in NoVA after 10 yrs in biglaw + inhouse bc I'm probably too financially conservative and just haven't cared about real estate like others have. I've never felt "settled" career-wise -- went thru the early part of biglaw thinking, save as much as you can in case you get pushed out as a 3rd yr (my firm was big on culling the size of the class before promoting people to midlevels); then when I made it to being a senior it was -- save all you can, you likely won't make this much forever; then when it was moving here for in-house it was -- don't know if I'll like it here/like the job, so let's  not commit too much financially. So maybe I need to change my own ways a bit . . . .[/quote]

I am the person who talked about being happy with what you have and not assuming that other people have some deep dark secret... it's just stuff, OP.  In the end, it's utterly and completely meaningless.  You mental state, your contentment or lack thereof, is way more important than the stuff you have.  There will always be people who have more beautiful homes without having worked a day in their lives.  So what?  Why does it even matter?  Do you think, sitting in some luxurious home is going to make you a happier person, or a better person?  More likely than not, if you owned a $4 million home you'd probably feel the exact same way that you feel right now.  I live in a house, I used to live in a 1 bedroom apartment.  I really love my home and I really loved my tiny old apartment.  But I can vouch that neither of them had much of an impact on my mental state.  I'm the exact same person I was then.  I have bad days and good days for virtually the same reasons.[/quote]

OP here -- I get what you're saying. It's just stuff. And obviously I'm made decisions not to purchase a ton of stuff. But I guess I think -- doesn't contentment to some extent come from accomplishment? How could it not? So if I was living in a $4 million home -- would I be thinking -- wow all my hard work has been worth it, look at this home I got to buy??[/quote]

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