Reply to New boyfriend, has a child he never sees.

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[quote=Anonymous]I would proceed cautiously if I were you.  I'd look for confirmation of $3500/month.  I have twins and their Dad makes around $60k and he's paying $1100/mo so $3500/month is crazy money in CS.  Does he have a lifestyle that seems to support that he could afford that level of CS?  Does he own his own house? What kind of car? What are his hobbies?  Does he have a career that generates over $500k/year.  If that doesn't seem to fit the bill, does he have a trust fund?

All we really know is that the mom went to CA when the baby was young and your BF was in his early 20s.  We don't know how often he did or didn't see the child before when she lived here.  We don't know how often the child was made available to him to visit early on.  We also don't know if he would have been able to keep his career if he had moved to CA.  He could legitimately believe that it is in the child's best interest to stay in the background.  And there could be legitimate reasons for him to believe that -- particularly if the mother made it difficult for him to be with the child.

Bottom line: If he's actually paying child support, I would continue to get to know him further.  Assess his character and learn more about the situation and you'll figure out if he's feeding you a line of bull and is lazy --- or if this situation is genuine.

It's very easy for people on the outside of a situation like this to judge and say what they would do.  But there are all sorts of factors that could have contributed to this situation.  If you like him and he's good to you, then it's worth learning more.[/quote]

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