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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]12:37 again.  I agree with the PP who says guys are saying it would be cool because they'd be flattered that a woman would go out of her way to find them.   My guess is that none of them would end up taking that woman seriously.

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Your guess would be wrong.

[b]It shows initiative.[/b] Asking for what she wants. Not being a wall flower.

The list of positive traits goes on and on.

Maybe he is involved with someone. Then end it.

Maybe you're super hot and he figured he was punching way above his weight.

Who knows?  Don't be creepy about it , . . Just do it. [/quote]

LOL.  Keep telling yourself that.  It looks desperate.  And creepy.  OP admits herself that she is "obsessed" with this guy.  She had a fleeting conversation with him on a bus.  He never even told her his last name.  If she's grasping at straws (short conversations with cute guys) and sleuthing to find their full names and contact details, that's desperation.

What did she do?  Did she piece together "Well, his name is Johnny and he mentioned Boston and he plays tennis, let me do so me googling!"

I dated a lot before I married (later in life), and my experience is that most normal people will "show initiative" at the appropriate time if they are interested.  If OP had reached out to him while on the tour or found him immediately after, then that would be one thing.  But she didn't.  She waited and did a sort of weird loop back.

I've also found that people who aren't desperate don't cling to brief meetings/conversations and obsess over them.   They do a "note to self: if you are having a good conversation with a stranger on a tour bus, make sure to get an email address."  They don't cyber stalk the person.

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