Reply to How to talk DW into adoption so she stays hot?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just on the off chance that this isn't a troll (which makes me shudder to think), OP you should save all that money adoption would cost you and invest it in a good therapist for you, a divorce lawyer for your wife and a vasectomy for the sake of humankind. [/quote]

Your lack of introspection is astounding. There are dozens upon dozens of threads on this forum of people whose relationships suffer because they stop being attracted to each other, and those threads are full of sympathetic replies. I see a way to avoid that future, at essentially zero cost since we'd still get to raise and love a kid together, and you think I need therapy and divorce and I'm terrible. Try thinking things through a bit more.[/quote]

Alright OP, I'll give you a serious answer.

First of all you're smoking crack that there is 'no cost' to adoption because

1) It is freaking expensive, downpayment on a house expensive to adopt. 
2) It is emotionally expensive because there is no guarantee of being chosen and there are many times the rug is pulled out from under you. Going through the adoption process is extremely trying on a marriage, minimizing this and thinking of it as an 'easy solution' to your wife getting fat shows a real ignorance of how hard it is
3) If you want a second kid, repeat 1 and 2

Additionally, carrying a child to term, being pregnant, going through that experience is VERY important to some women. As someone who struggled with infertility I went to great lengths to try to come to terms with the fact that I'd never have a baby (I ended up getting pregnant so it worked out but this was EXTREMELY difficult). I was very sad and depressed about this. And, as anyone on the infertility board can tell you, adoption (because of the reasons cited above) is not an easy or surefire solution to infertility. So you then have to come to terms with the fact that you might not have children at all. You say your wife is 35 (I think). So lets say you spend the next three years trying to adopt and it doesn't work out. All of a sudden your wife is at the tail end of her fertile years and might have a really hard time having a baby naturally. You going down this path could cost you and your wife the opportunity to be parents.

Logistically and financially this entire proposal is ludicrous. It is also, as many other PPs have pointed out, not super classy. You are assuming your wife will let herself go and assuming that if she doesn't remain a perfect 10 that your attraction to her will evaporate. My body has changed due to childbirth, but my husband now loves me even more as the mother of his children, the person who brought him this happiness. Life is a long road, and none of us look like perfect 10's after 55/60 or so. Love your wife, and don't make a major financial and familial decision based on the future tautness of her abs. If nothing else you'd be better served saving that money for plastic surgery after the fact to get everything tightened up. Guaranteed success and a lot less emotional instability.

And I feel like I need to end this with also saying that you do come across like a giant douchebag so at minimum you might need to alter your approach for when you tell your wife about this plan.[/quote]

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