Reply to This stepmonster gem from Carolyn Hax

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]@10:56 The idea that a stepmom should have an "equal say" in how an inheritance is spent - equal to the actual inheritors and their father - is preposterous and untenable.

It is not relegating her to "second fiddle" to tell her to back off with regard to how her stepchildren's inheritances are spent.[/quote]

I think parents are responsible for providing for the basic needs of their children. I think it is totally your responsible to leave your children a luxury item and expect someone else to foot the bill of raising your children.  It is not like a great uncle Joe left the children money to be used for college. Great uncle Joe is not responsible for dedicating his resources to this daughters basic needs.  So, this stepmother is responsible for raising her stepdaughter, putting in the time effort and a lot of money, because the mother decided to leave her daughter a luxury item.  If the mother were still alive and decided that the only thing she would pay for was private school, would anyone think that was reasonable?  Also, it's really not clear that the insurance was directed to the daughter as a beneficiary. It seems the dad is now telling me stepmom that that is how the mama wanted the funds to be spent.   At that time, the now deceased mom had no idea that her husband would choose to remarry, that a stepmother would be dedicating resources toward her daughter, or that her husband and his new wife might have additional needs of their own, in part because they are paying to raise her daughter.  Again, I have no problem with people keeping their inheritances.   I  just think it is selfish and irresponsible to provide your child with money dedicated to a luxury when you have not already fully funded and assess cities, and leave someone else responsible for that. [/quote]

The house and living expenses are likely taken care of by dads income. And much of the house was likely paid for by mom when she was alive.

Note, stepmom did not say she was in need of the house. They have a house. Step mom said she is in need of a bigger house in the bset "fancy" school district so her potential futurle.children can have a big house and live in a fancy school district.

VERY different things.

Stepmom wants to steal money from her stepdaughter to buy a house (likely in HER name) that becomes a marital asset now if they divorce (current home is probably in dads name only) so that she can purchase a luxiry for herself and future children.

And this house (purchase by dead mom/current daughters money) now in steps moms name will likely bypass the daughters if dad dies first (read the step mom posts from the other thread)

Calculating and manipulative that step mom is.[/quote]

which thread? 
[/quote]

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