Reply to Paying for adult children's vacation

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My in-laws offer to pay, but they always want to pay/go wherever their other kid wants to go.  We never have any say so we don't bother joining up.  I can't see paying out of pocket to spend time with my in-laws at a vacation place.  It's not exactly super relaxing.  [/quote]

My FIL does this as well. He will pay, but it has to be all on his terms. And not only that, he keeps excluding my DD form his cruise vacations. For a while, it was "boys" only.  Yes, he is 70, but calls men and himself boys.  So, for a while DH went with with his Dad and brother, fine, but then he kept trying to get grandsons to come, his daughter who lives in the same town, sent her son, but then we found out that her DD went too, while FIL was going on and on with his rhetoric that it is "boys" only and my DD can't come because "girls" ruin everything.  My DD would die to go and is a nice, nice kid.  At that point my DH said, he is not coming, nor is my DS coming, our DD is part of our family and both go or none. Since then DH hasn't gone on any of the cruises.  This was all done on his own accord without me suggesting anything. As we discussed at length in previous threads, many DHs can be pushovers when it comes to their controlling parents.  I am happy to stay at home and let them all go without me.  Honestly, the idea of my FIL making me a list of what to wear on his "cruise" gives me hives.[/quote]

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