Reply to Found out that DH had gay sex many years ago

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm more upset about the sexual abuse and want him to seek therapy to deal with that trauma.[/quote]
Believe it or not, it is possible for someone to get over something and move on.  What exactly would he be "dealing with" all these years later?  [/quote]

If he has not gone to therapy for the abuse... He had not "gotten over" the abuse.

He should deal with the feelings he has about being abused, how it negatively affects him now and how he can change those behaviors.

OP has not described "issues" there may be none right now. Often having kids triggers the PTSD of CSA.

Men generally think they can "handle it" and eventually self destruct.[/quote]

It is possible to move past things without therapy - just like some people need therapy to deal with grief and others don't, not everyone needs therapy for sexual abuse. [/quote]I agree.  Think about the numbe of victims of childhood sexual assault-- all of those people don't get therapy and many still turn out fine, though scarred (including me).[/quote]

Yes and the people who were abused should be able to tell their SO's these things without being raked over the coals, having people be suspicious of them and directing them to therapy like they are broken.
Fewer of them would be broken if people weren't horrified when the person talks about it.
Have a good life, PP, okay?[/quote]

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