Reply to I don't know how to process this fight/anger with my husband

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

Well, I don't think the real issue is whether or not he let you sleep in, which the post seems to be implying.  Maybe I'm reading it wrong.  To me, the problem is that he is not willing to go and help his own child when the child is crying and in need.  That's awful.  [/quote]

OP here - He knows I will never let my child suffer, therefore the child will never suffer.  So he can use not caring for the child/putting more burden on me as a way to hurt me. [/quote]

Do you understand that this is surely not how he sees it? In his mind, he is doing you a favor by getting up early on Sundays. He is mad at you, so he doesn't want to do you a favor. He does not view this as harmful to be kid because he knows someone is still going to take care of the kid.

To be clear: I am not saying he is right that he's doing you a favor. Or that he's right about the argument. Or anything else. But it seems like part of your extreme anger at him is that you think in his mind, he thinks it is ok to harm your child to get back at you. And that is not at all what he thinks. I think it's important for you to understand that if you want to get over the fight.[/quote]

I'm a DW who is totally on OP's side from how she described the situation. I never looked at it from quite that perspective. I still think OP is justified in her feelings, but now I'm looking at the DH's response to her differently. I guess due to your post I've downgraded him from a horrible-parent-asshole to just a plain old asshole. Thanks PP :)[/quote]

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