Reply to What do I need to know about marrying a man with an ex and shared custody of kids?

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[quote=Anonymous]Oh PP here/ the in law situation will also determine a lot. I have a wonderful mother in law who also took on two stepsons when she married my FIL. She could always listen to my fears and vents from that point of view rather than the "defensive grandmother" POV. It was so helpful to be able to say to her "I had no idea how hard this would be" and for her to say back  "I know."  She now has two ex daughters in law from her two sons and both remarried. She is kind and loving to all. We all have birth to one or more of her grandchildren and that is what she focuses on. Nobody is kicked out or shunned for being the ex because they are still mothers of grandchildren. She is just wonderful at balancing the care she has for the ex wives with the love and affection she also has for us second/current wives. In my best friends in life she is easily in the top 5. I don't know what I would do without her. But she also inspired me to be better and do better for my family and stepson while simultaneously validating that she knew it wasn't easy. [/quote]

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