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[quote=Anonymous]NP here. My mother was the exact same way, OP. She insisted on living very far from us, her only family, when she was well into older age. I spent years worrying that I would "get the call" and be forced to travel a long distance in the middle of the night, at a moments notice, no matter what was happening for us at home, work, school, etc. It also terrified me that she might die alone because I could not get there in time. So I begged. I bribed. I did everything I could think to get her to move to us. She refused. We fought. It was horrible. Years of periodic fighting.

Then, one day she called and said she was sick. Three months later she was gone. Thankfully, she did finally come to us for the last few weeks of her life. At that point, when we still thought she would get better, we agreed that if the doctor ever told her she needed care, or that "it was time," that she would move closer then. It didn't make me happy but it was a compromise I thought I could live with. Sadly, she died two weeks later so we never got a chance to see if the plan would have worked, but maybe it's an option for you.

I will say this, in hindsight, as we've been dealing with the shock and grief of her sudden death at a relatively young age (late-70s), I'm actually kind of glad to be able to say she lived her life on her own terms. As much as it worried me then, it's comforting now.[/quote]

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