Reply to Mother's Anxiety and Holidays

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP your mother sounds exhausting. You work and have a small child. If you're doing radiation you won't be able to do fun summer stuff in the sun unfortunately.

So thanksgiving will actually be your first real chance to rest after treatment.

Go. 
Have.  
Fun.

Do not cook a meal for a bunch of people and spend half of the day scrubbing pots.

See if your family can go someplace nice and relaxing. Get the hell out of dodge. Enjoy time with your child and spouse, who have also been under stress through all of this.

You deserve it. [/quote]

op! I've read every post in this thread.  Agree with PPs who said you[b] tell your dad directly to run interference[/b].  Set a firm boundary as in, "Dad, Joel and I have decided that with my cancer treatments, we simply are going day by day.  Fact is, most days, I don't feel so great.  It doesn't help me and in fact it agitates me especially now when I [b]feel like I'm being harangued by mom[/b] and and her demands to plan.  Stop!  Here's the deal.  I'm not Planning anything, at all now.  I'm working, taking care of Julia and Joel and prioritizing my health.  Honestly, in November, Joel and I want to rest and relax in Tahiti for a week.  
I need your support in helping me to rest and recuperate and not become unduly stressed about  much beyond a few days ahead."

Then, I swear, OP, do not engage.  Ignore future annoying communications.  Maybe don't respond if you get follow up questions.  Ignore your mom on FB.
Focus on your little family and your health and whatever gets you through day by day...and start planning that trip to Tahiti.  You are in control, believe it![/quote]

OPs dad enables her mother.  He's the one who sent the text message regarding Thanksgiving, not OPs mom. No way is he going to run interference! No offense meant at all to your dad OP, but he sounds like the type of man who gets bullied by his wife and just does what she says in order to get her to leave him alone.  Am I close? [/quote]

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