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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. 
I am so curious to see what the text thread looked like on Saturday night, whereby Jen comes out to meet DH at the bar. I was so so tempted to look at his phone yesterday but managed to resist, b/c i want to be able to come to this conversation from a position of non-crazy.  But I am tempted to ask him to show me the thread.

Or maybe I shouldn't get bogged down in the HOW. stick with the WHY is this happening? What is he getting out of it, and how can he get it elsewhere (either at home or with more appropriate friends)?

Has anyone had a convo like this with his/her spouse? [/quote]

Yes, I would be curious to hear how Saturday night and other times they met up started. Is your husband extremely attractive, charismatic, or wealthy? If not, for all you know these 20 something women are creeped out by him but are in a difficult place because he is a customer at their store and also an employer of sorts since they have babysat for you. I would guess they aren't too genuinely interested in a 10+ years older married guy with a kid who hangs around the bookstore and keeps texting them, even on Saturday night. They might think it is weird and sad. It's probably good that he talks with all of them and isn't fixated on just one of them.

Maybe you can approach things from the standpoint of being concerned about the feelings of these young women and the impression that he an old guy might be making on them. You can ask, "So how did it happen that Jen came to watch the game? Did you text her?" Say "It might seem to her that you're this creepy older guy who keeps texting her, and she's not comfortable, but she doesn't want to offend you because you're a customer at the store and she babysits for us. You know that attractive young women who work with the public have guys hitting on them all the time. Of course I know that you just want to be friends with Jen, but she might think you're this weird older guy pursuing her since married men with children don't usually suddenly start being friends with women 10 years younger that they meet in bookstores."[/quote]

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