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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hmmm...rants on racial purity, yuck.  What do you say when she does this? i would be PISSED. PISSED. And tell her never to talk like that again in your presence (or, kids, if you have them).

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I just quietly eat my food and make conversation with other guests. I don't want to stir drama and since she's not going to change her mind, there's no point in giving her an earful anyway.[/quote]

Many of us have ignorant racists in our own families or in our IL's. If you want to have any chance of changing them, the best thing to do is to continue to be polite and loving toward them as a daughter in law. Of course, always have a de-brief with your kids after visits and before visits with Grandma and Grandpa do not believe the way we do and don't take it too seriously. I'm not saying tolerate outright rudeness toward you, but research shows that challenging people's views and arguing with them only deepens there commitment to those views. What shatters their views? Actually getting to know a real person who is the "other" culture they are against. That you have control over. Hard, yes, but you are strong, your kids can handle it, and in the long run, you will have the best success. We're are with you! Good luck.[/quote]

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