Reply to Sister doesn't want to come to Christmas dinner with me

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Sister doesn't want to come to Christmas dinner with me "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Me and my sister are the only two family members living in the area for the past few years. We've always spent all special occasions together. This year, however, she doesn't want to spent any holiday with me. This is because I have a boyfriend and I spend the holidays with him and his family. His family is wonderful and they always warmly invite my sister along too since she's the only family I have in the country.

This year however she refused to join me for Thanksgiving and she is now refusing to join us for Christmas dinner as well. She says she'd rather spend them with a family friend than me and my boyfriend. She also has turned down the offer to celebrate New Years with us and our friends.

I can't help but feel hurt that she would rather spend the holidays with acquaintences than family.

Am I wrong?

[/quote]

Yup.  She would rather spend the holidays with family friends than with your boyfriend and his family, who are, after all, acquaintances.  I don't blame her for not wanting to tag along with you to your boyfriend's family.  She might very well want to spend the holidays with you, but that's not what you're offering.  [/quote]

What am I supposed to do then? NOT spend the holidays with my bf?[/quote]

Yes - if spending it with family is as important as you say!  You are arguing that family is most important but you are choosing to go with friends.  Your sister is choosing to be with friends too.  Why don't you drop your friend arrangements to be with her? - it's exactly what you are asking her to do.[/quote]

I did not "DROP" my sister to do anything or GO anywhere! We would always spend the holidays together including last year when I spent it with my boyfriend's family. We do not have immediate family in the area so we always spend it family friends. Last year my boyfriend expressed that it was important to him that I join him for Christmas  since we are serious and looking to get engaged very soon. Of course my sister was included as a packaged deal since I would not spend it without my sister. We always spend the holidays with people not our immediate family. What difference does it make whether it is with a friend of our mother's or my boyfriend's family? The point is that we are together and with people who are nice enough to offer us seats at the table.[/quote]

If your sister got engaged tomorrow and was going over to her boyfriend's parents house would it be o.k. for her to INSIST that you tag along with or without your boyfriend (too bad for his side).  Of course not.  Just because she is single doesn't mean that she gives up the right to feel comfortable celebrating wherever she damn well chooses.

Dh and I have ALWAYS made the effort to split our time between our families - this includes BEFORE we were married.  Because of our efforts our kids got to know both sides of our family.  That was important to us.  It was a priority for us.

Now we've moved and it is a comfort to know that we were able to do that.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics